Monday, June 15, 2009

Montel Williams Interviews Gollum

Montel:

Gollum, you've struggled with the ring for centuries. What was it like to lose it all instantly during that climactic confrontation on Mount Doom?

Gollum:

You know, Montel, I hated Tricksy Baggins at first. But I've really come to respect him.
I’m so sorry I bit off his finger, man.

Montel:

Really? You respect Frodo after biting off his ring finger and plunging into the volcano?

Gollum:

From where you're sitting, it might be hard to see. But it's all part of the healing process.

Montel:

Really? Do you think Frodo feels the same way?

Gollum:

I don't know. I send him letters. I pray for him, man. But he's, like, in the Grey Havens.
You don't write back once you're kicking it in the Grey Havens.

Montel:

So you're bitter.

Gollum:

Yeah, I'm bitter, man! I walked a hard damn road to get where I'm at.

Montel:

Don't you think Frodo walked a hard road?

Gollum:

Jesus, man. It's always Frodo this and Fellowship that. I'm not saying he doesn't deserve it. I'm just saying there are other angles.

Montel:

What would you say if I told you we had one of the Fellowship backstage?

Gollum:

Oh my Valar. You're kidding me.

Montel:

Come on out, Fellowship member.

Gollum:

Tricksy Baggins? You found Tricksy Baggins?

Montel:

We couldn't get Mr. Baggins. But we think we have a special treat for you.

Gimli:

Hey Gollum.

Gollum:

I never new your name. I knew they had a dwarf.

Gimli:

Well, I knew your name, bud. You're famous! Come here!

(They hug awkwardly.)

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